Archive for September, 2010

Hold the front page (not literally)

Monday, September 20th, 2010

Metaphors are everywhere. They’re all around us. But how often do you miss them when they’re right under your nose? We conducted a Quietroom experiment, looking at some of this morning’s front pages to see how pervasive their use of metaphor was.

The answer? Very. Even their mastheads are metaphors, albeit sometimes rather ill fitting ones. The Sun may well shine light into dark corners, but how much warmth does it radiate? What exactly is the Guardian guarding? Truth? Fairness? Elbow patches? As for the Daily Mail – well, that would only be an appropriate metaphor if every day one received a crayon-scrawled note from the neighbours complaining about the foreign family that’s moved in over the road.

Moving on to the metaphors themselves, let’s start with the Guardian. The front page is packed with almost fifty metaphors. Many are so ingrained in our vernacular that we no longer see how colourful their literal meanings are supposed to be. For instance, the assertion that Clegg is under pressure to ‘pick a fight with the prime minister’ makes you wonder whether a good bout of fisticuffs might not actually clear the air once and for all. And the idea of the HMRC team thundering down the road ‘to tackle’ a tax dodger is rather a reassuring one, too. Even the political soundbite du jour, Clegg’s promise not to ‘manufacture synthetic rows’ with the Tories, is a metaphor.

We also braved the Daily Mail. And it seems that today’s characteristically flammable tone is achieved with the help of metaphor (almost 30 on the front page, despite most of the space being taken up by a picture of Myleene Klass). Beneath a headline declaring a ‘tax war’ on the middle classes, we’re told that Nick Clegg has ‘launched a two-pronged attack’ in which tax evasion will be ‘aggressively pursued’. The Mail explains that the targets will be ‘those hiding money offshore’ (under the mattress? In the airing cupboard?). On a serious note, Clegg himself turns to metaphor to explain the effects of tax avoidance, describing it as ‘stealing money from your neighbours.’ It tells readers that, unless they’re the kind of person who’s willing to make off with the DVD player from next door, they shouldn’t be dodging their tax payments, either.

And The Sun? Well, of the lead story – about the Rooneys’ marital difficulties – there were fewer than fifty words on the front page. But we still learn that ‘Coleen [is] snubbing rat hubby’s matches’. Here, metaphor is used to insult. But, in truth, Coleen might have more fun living with an actual rat than with Wayne Rooney.

The Cat Sat on the Mat

Monday, September 6th, 2010

There you go – ‘the cat sat on the mat’ – just about the simplest sentence in the English language and with a readability score of 100, the highest you can get.

If you didn’t know about readability scores, then you’ve probably never heard of Rudolf Flesch.

Herr Flesch is responsible for two readability tests, which are really useful when you’re writing. Let’s concentrate on his Reading Ease test, which can give every piece of prose a score, based on words per sentence, syllables per word and so on. The higher the score, the easier it is to read – which brings us back to the Cat on the Mat.

Reader’s Digest has a score of about 65. For Barack Obama fans, the Harvard Law Review is down around 30. Closer to home, a recent piece in The Times on William Hague scores 50. The lead story in The SunStig was SAS Hero – scores 62.

Score 90-100 on the test, and your writing is easily understandable by an average 11 year old; 60-70 and you’re looking for someone who’s 13 to 15. Anything around 30, you need to be on campus.

Given that you can’t open a newspaper this morning without reading Tony Blair’s memoirs, I started wondering about speeches. Clearly Blair was a more effective public speaker than Gordon Brown. Was that because his speeches were simpler? After all it doesn’t come much simpler than “education, education, education.”

Apparently not. Blair talking about education in 2007 scored 66. Brown a year later on the economy scored 67. Martin Luther King’s ‘I have a dream’ speech – which I’d always thought one of the simplest speeches I’d heard – scored 58.

Any marketing man will always tell you that your message must match the intended audience. And if you’re writing something, it’s easy to check. How do you find the Reading Ease score of something you’ve written? No problem. Ask Microsoft Word. It’s in Word-Preferences-Spelling and Grammar. Tick ‘show readability statistics’ then run a spelling check under Tools.

So far, this blog scores 56 – exactly half way between The Times and The Sun. Gulp. I should be writing for the Daily Mail…